| ...in the sunshine... |
[Jul. 25th, 2008|05:12 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home, mofo! | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Go! Team | ] |
I'm about to head out for some Royal Delhi Palace with the wife, two of my engineers and their wives.
It's time to kick this thing in to the next phase. |
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| ...love it... |
[Jun. 17th, 2008|12:33 pm] |
What an experience.
I'm feeling quite elated at the moment, and part of me feels the need to write it down and broadcast it to the world. I never understood that part of me--the one that needs to speak out loud to anyone listening--but when it strikes, I merely obey.
There are things that transpire in our lives that change us in such a way as to make us great individuals if you can get past the struggle. There is a fundamental failure in the current iteration of humanity that leads me to believe that we no longer understand what it means to struggle. The idea of perseverance is lost to the arrogance of the narcissistic, ignorant, and deceived generations. We've come to a point where we expect absolute freedom sans consequences and when we do suffer for our choices, the outrage that something of this sort has happened overwhelms any lessons potentially learned.
I wonder if it is possible to recover from where we, as humanity, currently are?
Today, Britain will release Abu Qatada, the radical cleric who is the right hand man of Osama Bin Laden, without charging him for no other reason that absurd political correctness. Have we descended so far in to madness that we no longer enforce the laws of basic humanity? That we scream the US government is guilty of "illegal war crimes" (ignore the fact it was legally approved via Congress) but let blatant murderers walk free?
All politics aside (I really don't want to debate the issue of the war here), we've become so bent on perceived slights, might-have-beens, and potential-maybes that we've given up making ourselves better people by pushing through our struggles, growing and becoming better people. I am always amazed when people blame everyone else for their problems and refuse to do what they need to do in life. As if they're the single most important thing on this planet.
Truth doesn't disappear just because you distort your reality. People who desire to kill, conquer and destroy don't stop being those people just because you think the world should be made up of flowers, ponies and people who love everyone around them. Did you somehow think that putting all those good intentions, witty protest signs and internet petitions out in to the universe that things were just going to magically get better? I mean, honestly, do you feel better about yourself? They must, because people keep doing it--fighting the false front to no avail.
Of course, the irony is that I'm writing this in a LiveJournal blog. |
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| ...many theories... |
[Jun. 7th, 2008|09:52 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Coldplay - Viva La Vida | ] |
What a journey life has laid out for us.
I feel the need to write again (as I often do when I stop writing for a while), and good ol' LJ has my back as usual.
The last few years have been quite the road of trials and triumphs, but somehow we came out on top and things are looking up. The short version is Perpetual Entertainment to Sigil Games Online to Disney. Yeah, I'm working for Disney now and I have to tell you one thing:
This company rules.
Anyway, I wanted to give an update. Things are great with us and I intend to start updating this page with increasing frequency, but for now I have a D&D campaign to ready for tonight's game.
Love and Peace,
D |
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| ...knock it out... |
[Jul. 24th, 2007|11:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  peaceful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Hive - Bedlam | ] |
Here's an interesting thought: What if I accepted the job to be a Game Designer for Gaia Online's new MMO they're working on?
More over: Would I still love myself in the morning?
All signs point to yes.
P.S. I freaking REALLY miss ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) kozispoon and I wish she would come home from her really awesome trip to Nicaragua. 13 days left.
Please come home safe and sound to me. I love you. |
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| ...you can if you want... |
[Jul. 6th, 2007|12:20 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  melancholy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Rihanna - Umbrella | ] |
Kassandra leaves for Nicaragua Monday and she will be gone for a month.
I will never be more lonely in my life than I will these next 30 days.
Please come home safely, I cannot live without you. |
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| ...just like a dream... |
[May. 21st, 2007|10:25 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Used: Lies for the Liars | ] |
Thank you so much for your kind comments. Honestly I feel like I'm going out of my mind, as of late. I absolutely hate not being at my desk, working on a project. Now I'm at home going mad.
On a lighter note, Kassandra and I went out yesterday and I picked up Pokemon: Diamond for her. Needless to say, she was very excited and after about 10 minutes of watching her play, I... uh... picked up Pokemon: Pearl for, um, her.
Okay, I lied.
I bought Pearl for myself and from about 4:30p until about 3am, we played Pokemon together.
I guess that's the best part about being unemployed!
I think that I'm going to start posting more over the next few weeks. I mean really, what else have I got to do? But for now, I gots some Pokemons to catch!
 |
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| ...one more, one time... |
[May. 20th, 2007|01:50 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sad | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Mae: The Everglow | ] |
Suffice to say that I am about to just give up, yet again.
After moving from San Francisco to San Diego, six months in to my job, SOE decided to purchase our company and I was laid off. The sad thing? I was laid off for political reasons. I would really like to go in to detail about it, especially since our CEO burned us pretty bad, but to do so would be unwise as I am currently applying at several other studios right now.
I don't even know what to say anymore. I'm so incredibly depressed it's not even funny. I worked so hard to get to this point and I've sacrificed so much to be here that I'm ready to break down and cry. Now, instead of going to the office to work on our game, I'm packing my things to move us back to the bay area.
I'm not angry at SOE in the slightest. In fact, if it wasn't for them, everyone would have lost their jobs and the game would have gone under. I'm angry at people who played nice to my face and then when it came down to it, stabbed me in the back. I'm angry at myself for trusting them and for letting them get to me. I am so broken right now, it hurts. To top off the fuel of frustration, I've had to turn down all out-of-state offers due to a family issue; I need to stay in CA for several extenuating reasons. Again, I'm not angry about that, it's the way of life and I believe that family is greater than anything, therefore sacrifices must be made.
I'm just scared. There are potentials on the horizon, but right now we're trying to get out of our condo before they bill us again and we're hoping someone will take over the lease so we don't have to come up with five grand to break it.
God, I've always needed you, but today, I need you most of all.
-Daniel |
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|
| ...out of character... |
[Nov. 28th, 2006|07:39 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | transition | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  exhausted | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Ferry Corsten - L.E.F. | ] |
So I know I said I wasn't going to post anymore, and honestly, I don't really visit here much, but this is a significant update. For those of you who know me, Kassandra and I are moving to San Diego. I've been hired away from Perpetual to a company called Sigil Games Online. I am now a full-time Game Designer for an MMO called Vanguard.
Finally my dreams are coming true. |
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| ...end of an era... |
[Apr. 26th, 2006|11:00 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Work | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | happy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Fort Minor - The Rising Tied | ] |
This will be my last post here.
Like all things in a cycle, they eventually come to an end. Truthfully, I never post here anymore anyway. I will maintain this account, check back in on my friends, and on occasion post comments in their entries.
All of my current entries will be going FRIENDS-ONLY as of this week and I will be cutting most of my profile information. A lot of this has to do with my job and the fact that I'm tired of people trying to hunt me down because of what I do for a living.
I can't believe how I've changed from the first entry to the last.
Life is crazy.
Take care, I love you all.
P.S. Please feel free to post comments, however I will be keeping them all hidden. :) |
|
|
| ...perspective collection... |
[Sep. 30th, 2004|02:26 am] |
x-posted to my 1Up Blog
In just a few short days classes will start back up for the Winter Quarter and I will be neck deep in programming, 3D modeling, writing game reviews and the holiday season. I love San Francisco this time of year, the way the clouds linger desperately in the mid-day and the wind rips ferociously at all new students, tourists and fresh faces. Like the industry I find myself entwined in, I have come to believe that this city eats people alive and never spits them out. I often wonder if some people come here and just can't cut it, simply falling apart at the seams. I wonder if it is a smaller scale reproduction of what's going on in our industry.
The game industry has moved beyond its golden years and has graduated into a cash cow. The Alfred Hitchcock's and the Tim Burton's of old are few and far between, the ones who are left are retiring or making way for the Michael Bay's and Spielberg's of the industry. We are beginning to see the game industry's focus shift from the game to the harvest, so to speak. I could sit here and lament the days of old, how graphics don't make a game, or how it's the concept, not the 15 different points of audio that make the experience, but frankly, that's a lie today. We have adapted to the current conception of the video game just as a person who drives a BMW for ten years can't drive a Geo Metro without going insane.
If you haven't heard by now Vivendi Universal Games is being sued by Neil Aitken for violation of overtime laws in California. In a recent article published in the Computer Gaming World November 2004 issue regarding the lawsuit (pg.29), Steve Meister of Bethesda Software was quoted as saying "If you don't like the way you're treated at work, try to find work at a company that has more reasonable expectations of its employees." Several other unnamed developers felt that Aitken should not have filed the suit and should have just found another job altogether.
Folks, it is at this point that I have to take a step back and resist the urge to slap people Zsa-Zsa style. When has it ever been okay to rip people off? When has it ever been okay to step on the little guy? When has it ever been okay to take advantage of someone just because you have the ability to? Hey, just because you can doesn't make it right. California and Federal law give us protection against this kind of behavior and just because someone stood up to it doesn't give you the right to come down on him. This industry is in a dangerous state and it's not going to get better any time soon. As it stands, one way or another Federal and/or State intervention seems imminent and with companies like Rockstar Games and Running with Scissorsbearding the lion, how much longer will it take before we're seeing some sort of heavy-handed regulation? Couple this with the fact that we are seeing a major shift in development cycles, development house closures, poor accounting practices, bad games and the ever-present, ever-growing piracy issue, where are we headed?
Last quarter I had a class called "Data Structures and Concepts" and it was taught by a talented young man who was working at LucasArts on an unspecified project. One night in the middle of the quarter, during the middle of class he got a phone call that he had been laid off. Mind you, it's 8pm on a Tuesday night and he's getting a phone call informing him that he's coming in to a pink slip in the morning. Needless to say, he left the class and drove to LA where he was hired on at EALA for work on another game. He had to quit teaching in the middle of the quarter and leave.
The behavior of this industry is abhorrent, and it's going downhill fast. We've modeled ourselves after corporations like Microsoft and Enron. We idolize the Hollywood ideal and the people who head the major publishing houses have little to no interest in games what-so-ever, except whatever it can profit them now. Unless you're a Jon Carmack or a Cliffy B of the industry, you're meat, you're forced into working unpaid overtime, you're looked down upon and if you don't like it you should look for another job. Are we set to implode or is everything going to be shipped overseas to $2/hour programmers and non-English speaking tech support? More importantly, is there any hope for people like me who just want to create a game that's more than a fancy physics engine and some shiny water effects?
Gaming is becoming like film and music, you have to show exceptional talent or know someone on the inside to even hope to get a shot. I remember the first day of my Data Structures class, the instructor was asking each person to give a brief introduction and then tell everyone what they wanted to do upon graduation. I will never forget how the majority of students wanted to work for someone else for lots of money and bags full of success. One student even went so far as to brazenly declare that he "hated coding" and he just wanted to be a producer, the "idea man" behind the game. I still don't understand why he's majoring in programming. Regardless, when it came my turn, I realized that these individuals wanted success without forging a path, and this is what feeds the industry, the machine if you will.
As long as there are people with ideas and the burning desire to create them then there will always be great games, just fewer and far between, and sometimes with crummier graphics. However, as long as the majority of new industry recruits are content to just "work for someone" else and hope to make their "millions" doing the grunt work of others, then companies like EA, Microsoft, Vivendi Universal, and a host of other money-centric profit machines will continue to churn through developers like America does Prozac. Face it, there are enough brilliant 17 year old programmers and 3D modelers on the up and up right now who are willing to work for minimum wage that the time has come for people like Neil Aitken to stand up and call these corporations on their poor treatment of employees. More importantly, shame on you Mr. Meister for not having your fellow developer's back and telling him to find a new job even though the company he is working for is violating State and Federal laws, way to be a part of the problem and not the solution. |
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